3/16/10

On 3/16/10 our profile book (click on like and you can view the book we made) arrived at our adoption agency. I tracked that packed for 5 long days until it finally arrived there. I immediately began to wonder when it would be shown. What things would she like about it? Would it be our sweet Sadie girl pictures that she liked or the cute nursery pics to show we were all ready for our little one. Little did I know that almost immediately it was shown and the person it was shown to would forever change my life! Little did I know it was Nils's video games and musician qualities that would draw her to us. Our book didn't even need to be completed yet because our homestudy wasn't finalized but I had it all ready to go and just felt like I needed to get it ordered! I had a coupon that needed to get used up too so that was part of my push. But now I know the real reason. I needed to get that book done asap because I was about to become a mommy! I was about to have all my dreams made come true. All those years trying and longing for a sweet baby. All the tears and heartache were something I would go through all over again! If I could go back and tell myself what was ahead and how you are going through this for a reason and He is more amazing than you could ever dream of then that would have made those dark days so much easier!
I share all of this for 2 reasons. The first is that there are a few of my sweet friends still waiting, dreaming, hoping, and living in some of the darkest, loneliest days they will hopefully ever go through but I know without a doubt that when your day comes all this pain, all this hurt will be completely healed and that sweet face of your baby WILL make this wait worth it! The other reason is that Ive been on a message board for years now and one of the sweet girls on there just adopted her 2nd sweet baby. Both of her girls are from the same birthmom and I have had the honor of watching all of this unfold for the last several months. Yesterday her 2nd miracle came into this world, healthy, and beautiful! I have seen pictures today and it brings back floods of memories and tears remembering the day Stewart arrived. Her and I have had long conversations about everything in life and she has been a HUGE support through trying to conceive and then through the adoption process. She has an open adoption with her birthmom and I just love to see how others can have this amazing relationship with the girl who not only chose life for our sweet baby but who trusts me to raise, love and be mommy to them! I am so excited that all of her dreams have come true just like mine have! :) Adoption is an amazing, emotion filled life long process and I love having people to walk this journey with!